I have talked about how themes come through in waves; in other words, a topic will be brought to me (or to my attention) and this will be followed by a week or two of people with the same theme or a variation thereof. Today’s article is one such theme.
Games People Play
My hubby and I were discussing a “hot topic” for me. You know, a topic that pushes your buttons and makes you prickly?
My hot topic is: Games People Play. Manipulating others to get what they want, regardless of who they hurt.
This is the theme that has passed through the last two weeks.
Games are instigated by someone who is insecure and fearful; they feel a need for control. By manipulating their surroundings, the “Puppet Master” has control of his/her environment and the people involved.
Manipulation Tools
Some of these manipulation tools are: bullying, intimidating, playing victim, back-stabbing, guilt, etc.
When I was in my twenties, I would get a kick out of my grandmother; she would say what was on her mind…consequences be darned. I would smile at her moxie and think that I couldn’t wait to be her age to speak my mind.
I didn’t make it to her age to begin.
Too Many Power Play Experiences
I think it really began to take off with one boss who promised insurance and incremental pay increases. Month after month, I was put off on my attempts to hold the owner to his word.
I guess he figured that since I was a single mom, I had no choice but to stay and be mistreated.
Wrong.
I told him, “You have misused and abused me…now you lose me.”
I quit.
We always have a choice to “play” or not. (Be responsible for your actions; do you need another job in place before you quit?)
I began speaking up more and more and playing less and less. It was actually quite freeing.
Watching the Energy
When these games are played, the energy of the Puppet Master tries to infiltrate and dominate or control others energy. To me, this looks like black tendrils or arms coming from the Puppet Master and wrapping around a person in order to smother their instinctual protective mode and then they control that person.
Unpleasant.
I guess it is safe to say that – out of the two energies…love or fear…that this action is not done out of love.
On a More Personal Level
We have a choice, usually on a daily basis, to accept someone into our reality/life, or to walk away.
We are all given opportunities to be faced with people who want to befriend us. Some are wonderful beings to have in one’s life; others, not so much.
Listening to Self
Not everyone listens to their intuition, instinct, gut, etc. These can be something along the lines of a sudden tightening of one’s stomach; a feel of nausea; the hair standing on the back of the neck; disgust towards that person; thinking, “I’ve got a bad feeling…” These are some of the possible warning signals that the person (or people, or situation) is not good for us.
It’s okay to say no and walk away from an unhealthy energy interaction, or to refuse to play someone’s game.
Does that make you a cold person? Or someone afraid of, or running from, commitment? Not in my book. I certainly don’t want to be with, or around, someone whose intent is out of fear and control. Yuck.
Ask yourself if that person is Trash or Treasure? Do you feel good around them or do you feel like garbage? Do you need to keep them in your life, or do you need to walk away from them?
Life is too precious to spend it on playing in the manipulation games.
Life is too short to put up with bull crap. I’m just saying…
by Jan Toomer
Follow Us!